


A little suffering is good for the soul

by tigerlo



Category: Wentworth (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-05
Updated: 2016-08-05
Packaged: 2018-07-29 12:47:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,254
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7685194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tigerlo/pseuds/tigerlo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Allie Novak was a tease. A red-blooded, blue-eyed, professional fucking tease. </p>
<p>And Bea Smith was just...frustrated...that's all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A little suffering is good for the soul

**Author's Note:**

> A little Allie and Bea canon fill-in and companion piece from 4x01 to the end of 4x11, because I cannot get these two out of my head. 
> 
> Totally ignoring the season finale, as I'm convinced Bea's going to pull a Jon Snow and prove us all wrong.

-

Allie Novak was a tease. A red-blooded, blue eyed, professional fucking tease. 

And Bea Smith was just...frustrated...that's all. 

Frustrated and out of control of her own physical responses and reactions like a damn teenager. 

She had tried to resist it with every ounce of willpower she possessed but Allie was just so damn persistent, and eventually Bea’s body and mind just decided independently of her brain to bow towards the attraction, and to….react accordingly. 

Totally absolutely fucking independently of her brain, because Bea Smith was not gay. Maybe she wasn't certain she wanted to be straight most of the time either, but she'd sure as hell never been attracted to another woman before. 

But Allie, she just knew exactly which buttons to push, and knew exactly where the line was, beyond which Bea would grab her hand to stop her and vehemently proclaim her heterosexuality. A line of tolerance that kept bloody moving, Bea noted with a grimace. 

And she's not an idiot, right, she knows there are plenty of women in this godforsaken place who take female lovers inside, and would never for a second entertain the idea outside of this shit hole. She also knows that as top dog, if she ever decided that's what she wanted to do she would literally have girls throwing themselves at her left right and centre. 

But she's not interested in anyone else, just in Allie fucking Novak, Kaz’s right handed woman. The only potentially problematic score in this whole prison. 

And as much as she's tried (and by Christ she's tried) to ignore it, she can't ignore the way her body betrays her around Allie. It bends towards her, it angles to find her gaze across the shitty cafeteria or the crowded yard on a fine day. 

She can still remember how quickly her heart had thundered in her chest, the beats turning from aggression and rage to something very different when Allie had dropped to her knees in the shower.

She had been too bloody shocked at the time to react with anything other than anger and denial, but later that night, and the night after that, and the night after that, Allie’s goddam offer still spun its way around in her head, stubbornly refusing to leave. 

Distance then, Bea thinks practically, distance will help. She's just got to make sure she doesn't find herself in a situation where Allie can get inside her head again. 

And it works for about twenty four fucking hours, and then her bloody brain goes off and betrays her, and she offers to cut Allie’s hair. For no reason beyond the fact that she wanted an excuse to get to spend some time in Allie’s company. Running her hands through her hair. 

Yep, excellent job on the maintaining distance front you love struck idiot, she thinks to herself. 

-

Allie had been so pliant under her hands, leaning back into her touch as Bea combed her fingers through her long hair, asking questions about colour and style, trying to stay as removed as possible given their proximity. 

“I don't give a fuck Bea, do whatever you want as long as you don't stop doing that with your hands. I'm all yours,” Allie had said dreamily, looking Bea straight in the eye, leaning back and twisting round, eyes fluttering shut when her hair had caught slightly between Bea's fingers. 

She'd dropped her hands and smacked Allie on the shoulder and had tried to ignore the way the other woman had melted beneath her hands when she carried on with her ministrations. 

Self control wavering dangerously towards the end of the shampooing, Bea had given in and had decided to test Allie’s response to her touch. Alternating, she switched between firm strokes of her fingers against Allie’s scalp (this received a pleasant hum in response), grasping handfuls of hair and pulling lightly (a lower moan, one that Bea can feel vibrating through Allie’s entire body) and scratching her nails lightly along the bottom of her hairline by her neck (this caused an actual hitch in Allie’s breathing followed by her biting her lip to keep quiet and Bea thinks, a slight squirming in the chair, in an attempt to bring her crossed legs closer together).

Allie has stayed relatively quiet throughout the hour and a half they're alone together, and Bea's not sure if it helps matters or not. Sure she doesn't have to bat away Allie's constant flirting, but it leaves her mind far too much time to wander dangerously, sneaking glances at Allie’s in the mirror's reflection. 

“All done,” she had said finally, hands coming to rest on Allie's shoulders once she was finished. 

“Thank god for that,” Allie had exclaimed, standing up and turning in the mirror, studying herself.

Allie had spun round, a wicked grin on her face, as soon as she pulled the pissed off reaction she wanted from Bea. 

“You sure you weren't a lesbo on the outside?” Allie had smirked at her. 

“Fuck off,” she had fought back, the defence coming to her automatically. “You know I wasn't.”

“Damn waste, no one's ever made me so wet playing with my bloody hair before.” 

Her brain failing her, Bea had only managed a stupidly blank stare in response, before Allie twirled around and flitted out of the room. 

“Thanks for the new do babe, I owe you. See ya round.”

-

Bea would be flat out lying to herself if she didn't admit it, but it had been all downhill from there. She could have sent someone else to get that fucking milk but no, she had to bloody do it herself. 

She could have pushed Allie away when she stepped into Bea's space but she didn't, she let her get closer and closer. She could have stopped her when she felt Allie grip her hip with one hand, and her chin with the other, and pulled her in until their lips met. 

It has been instantaneous, like an electric shock passing between the two of them. A hot spark, like someone had set a couple of de-fib paddles directly onto the small of her back or the inside of her thighs. 

She knows it's bullshit and it's only because Allie has wound her up so fucking tightly these past few weeks, but if Allie had dropped to her knees again, there wouldn't have been a damn thing Bea couldn't have done to stop her. 

She can feel Allie testing the kiss, feels the way she notes how Bea pulls back ever so slightly when she runs a soft cautious hand up from her hip to brush lightly against the side of her breast, feels how Allie pulls away softly then, not wanting to push Bea past her invisible line of tolerance. 

“Now we can go,” is all Allie had said simply, turning to leave Bea alone with her traitorous thundering heart. 

-

It's much easier than she had anticipated to make excuses for herself after that, desperate to feel the touch of Allie’s lips on her own again. 

So she gives in and agrees to meet Allie in the shitty equipment room one night, but she's nervous as hell and fumbles her hands and pulls away, confidence and bravado all but gone out the fucking window like her freedom. 

But Allie takes the lead again and plays with that invisible line, dangerously this time, comes so close to crossing it that Bea almost storms out, sick of feeling like an inexperienced teenager, but Allie senses the break before it comes and pulls back. 

She winds their hands together and they just kiss and honestly, it's like every bullshit fairy tale she's ever hear of. She wants...more... more of this, more of Allie, but she's not there yet so she settles for letting Allie push her up against the metal counter, lets Allie climb into her lap, and roll her hips, and kiss Bea so deeply she forgets her own name. 

-

Of course it's all too good to be true though, and it all comes undone while Allie has her hand slipped under her shirt, over her bra, and her mouth is hot against Bea’s neck and she breaks everything with a few stupid words. And Bea pushes her away, and locks her armour back into place because it's the only thing she knows how to do, and how fucking stupid was she to think this would end any differently. 

-

It really all goes to shit from there. She almost fucking dies, has the life very nearly extinguished from her in a grubby kitchen sink, and wakes up in a cold bed and remembers nothing. 

She gets back to Gen Pop and she shuts Allie out and watches as she gets back on the gear and disintegrates in front of her. She watches as Allie throws herself at every woman she can reach, and Bea does nothing to stop it or help because she's a fucking coward. 

She tells the others it's not her problem because that's easier than dealing with how she really feels, so she shuts it all out until she hears Allie’s plea down the hallway. 

It's the defeat in Allie’s voice that finally gets to Bea. She’s given up, already resigned herself as another lost fucking cause, and that more than anything stirs her up enough to finally do something. 

So she has Allie transferred to H block, and stays with her as she screams and cries and the drugs tear their way violently out of her system. 

-

After the storm clouds roll back, she lies in bed with Allie, legs entwined, listening to the soft rise and fall of her breath. 

She trails her fingers up and down Allie's arm, watching absentmindedly as little goosebumps appear in the wake of her touch. She is much bolder in touching Allie when the other woman is asleep, can explore and test without Allie watching her curiously with a quirked eyebrow raised.

Her hands move across from Allie’s arm to run up her side, along the sharp line of her hip bone, higher and higher until she's skimming the side of Allie’s breast. 

She's startled slightly when Allie speaks, she'd been so distracted she hadn't noticed her wake up. 

“Don't start something you don't intend on finishing, you tease,” Allie said half-asleep still, voice rough from the last few hard days. 

“Who said I wasn't going to finish it,” Bea says in reply, feeling bold in the face of the events of the past few days.

“Well thank Christ for that,” Allie says smirking. “I was starting to worry you didn't have it in you, Bea.” 

Allie grinned up into Bea's scowl then. 

“As much as I'd like nothing more than to shove your hand down my pants right now, I don't want spend our first time covered in spew and snot. Raincheck, hey?”

“Yeah sure, whatever you want love,’ Bea said, dropping her hand.

“I'm going to go and freshen up before breakfast, try not to get yourself off while I'm away yeah, I'll make it worth your while later,” Allie said with a wink, before disappearing out the door. 

Yep, Bea thought to herself, a Grade A fucking tease. Well two can play at that game Allie Novak, just you wait and see. 

-

The games take a backseat momentarily when Bea's world shifts on its access and she abdicates her throne. 

She always thought she needed the power to give her life some sort of meaning, but it's taken Allie to make her realise all its ever done is act as a distraction, something to help her pass the time. 

She thought it gave her meaning, the status, but she realises catching Allie's eyes like a fucking love sick sap, that she couldn't actually give less of a shit about it. 

So she gives it all up, just like that. Hands the poisoned crown off to Kaz on the way out and doesn't look back as she walks from that yard, leaving everyone looking as dumbstruck in her wake as she feels inside. 

-

Allie finds her first, of course she does, and when she kisses her there's no illusion or pretense anymore. She lets Allie strip off her armour one last time and, hands trembling terribly, does the same to Allie in kind. 

It's like nothing she's ever felt before, Allie's hands all over her body. She moves her hands over Bea and leaves smouldering nerve endings in her wake. She lets Allie push her down into the mattress and doesn't resist when she kisses her deep and slow. She rolls over submissively when Allie flips her onto their sides, so she can run her hands down Bea's body in a way that doesn't expect any reciprocation, instead allows Bea to just feel everything. 

She wants to touch Allie, tries to move around but she refuses each time. 

“Keep your hands to yourself Smith, we've got all night for that. I just want to touch you. It's all I've been thinking about since I first saw you. 

“I've dreamed about what it would feel like to kiss you, and kneel down in front of you, and slide my fingers so deeps to you you'll forget anyone else was ever there before me.”

“I've dreamt about wanting to claim you, about you claiming me in front of everyone else. About making you mine forever.”

She sucks Bea's earlobe into her mouth, teeth pulling gently, and Bea's breath comes out in a stuttered gasp. 

“Oh come on babe, you're not going to rob me of a good moan are you? Everyone already thinks we're fucking, we don't want to let them down now, do we?” 

Bea gasps as she feels Allie's hands slip slowly under the edge of her underwear, pausing momentarily to allow Bea the option to back out. She's too far gone to mouth a reply, so rolls her hips into Allie's hand in acquiescence. 

“Besides, i'm not going to let everyone think I'm shit in the sack. I'll have you moaning these walls down before the morning.”

Her touch is hesitant at first, slow but confident as she moves her fingers through the wetness she finds between Bea's clenched legs. 

“Jesus, can you feel how wet you are,” she says into Bea's ear, mouth dropping lower to bite at her neck as her fingers slip lower still, moving lazily around her entrance. 

“I want you to focus on me,” she says feeling Bea still underneath her as her fingers stop just short of their goal. 

“I'm going to wipe every other memory out of your mind, just focus on my fingers.”

She moves her hand up then, out of Bea's underwear to toy roughly with her nipple, giving Bea a moment to reset her brain, to shake the fog of her past sexual experiences from her mind. 

Once Allie feels Bea relax into her touch again she allows her hand to dip lower, teasing the edge of the elastic, before sweeping down and running her fingers softly  
over the front of Bea's centre, nowhere near the pressure she knows Bea desperately needs. 

“Tell me what you want,” Allie says huskily. “Tell me how much you need me to touch you.”

Bea's hand moves from where it's bunched white-knuckled in the blanket in front of her to pull roughly at Allie, grasping behind her, weaving her fingers through blonde hair. 

“If you don't hurry up and fuck me, I'm going to fuck myself,” Bea growls. 

“Don't fucking tempt me,” Allie growls back, before her hand moves quicker than Bea can follow and she buries two fingers knuckle deep in hot, wet heat and Bea can only gasp at the sudden intrusion, every cell in her body suddenly alight. 

Allie moves slowly at first, the angle a little difficult, so she manoeuvres them slightly until she's leaving over Bea and she can move more freely putting the full force of her arm into every stroke. 

Bea is wonderfully beyond comprehension by now, all coherent thought reduced to a steady stream of curse words as she clenches tightly around Allie's fingers. 

Allie's mouth moves lower again, her tongue slipping over Bea's nipple as her thumb moves up to brush against her clit with every movement of her hand. Feeling Bea's hips start to jump to meet her hand, Allie slides another finger in and feels Bea shudder and slow slightly, as her body stretches around Allie. 

It doesn't take long, in fact Bea almost stills her hand in an attempt to make it last longer before she realises they have all night. 

Allie has her tongue in Bea's mouth, sweeping against each other when she feels Bea start to shudder underneath her, the movement starting low in her belly as her muscles fluttered around Allie's fingers. 

The orgasm hits Bea hard and fast, like a punch, and she doesn't even have time to make a sound, mouth open half way through a moan as she comes. 

Allie's fingers slow inside her but don't stop immediately, working Bea down carefully before she withdraws them completely. 

Bea pulls Allie towards her then, trying to express the thoughts screaming madly through her brain with her lips and her hands, words completely beyond her. 

Running her fingers through her hair to push it away from her face, cheeks slightly flushed, Allie moves to lay beside her, fingers stroking lazily at Bea's stomach. 

Bea is still trying to catch her breath whilst attempting to form a coherent sentence, when she feels Allie's hand move off her. 

It takes her a moment to realise what's happening, eyes still fixed on the ceiling, when she hears Allie moan softly beside her. 

Bea looks over and watches where Allie's hand has disappeared beneath the band of her own underwear, her fingers stroking quickly, and her breath coming in small pants. 

“Wait,” Bea says, fingers slipping over Allie's wrist, slowing her hand. “I want to…will you let me...do that for you?” Bea asks, uncertainty flooding back with the retreat of her own orgasm. 

“You don't have to if you don't want to,” Allie says softly, lips parting slightly. “Don't feel like you have to just because.” 

Allie moves her hand to cover Bea's, her face alight with concern and doubt. 

“I want you to do it because you want to, and if you don't right now that's totally ok, but I think I'll die if I don't get myself off after doing that to you. I don't think I've ever been so hot for anything in my entire life.” 

“I want to,” Bea says nervously, her hand drawing crosses on the back of Allie's hand. “I'm just not sure what to do.”

Allie kisses her suddenly then, surging up and crashing their lips together. She moves desperately against Bea in a way she hasn't ever before, and she pulls Bea's hand down towards her waist as they break apart. 

“Honestly, I'm so turned on it's going to be pretty hard to fuck up,” Allie says with a laugh. “Seriously though, just do what you like, and I'll tell you if I want anything different, ok?” 

Bea nods nervously as Allie takes her own hand away, leaving Bea to toy with the edge of her underwear. 

“You know,” Bea says, voice low and dangerous, trying to summon some sort of false courage in the absence of the real thing. “It was a pretty shitty thing you did earlier, leaving me high and dry in here. I have half a mind to return the favour you know.”

Allie's eyes flutter shut at the sound of Bea's voice, and Bea moves her hand to brush shyly against the front of Allie's underwear, shockingly wet under her feather-light touch. 

“Do you know how hard it was not to touch myself, to try and take my mind off the thought of you. Do you know how often I dreamed about what it would finally feel like when you did touch me? It was torture, Novak.”

“I swear to god,” Allie tries to start, before Bea silences her with a harsh kiss. 

“Uh,uh,” Bea says when they break apart. “I know how badly you want to get off but I know even more how much you want it to be me that does it, not you. So behave.”

Bea drops her head and kisses a line from Allie's earlobe, down her neck, to the top of her breast. She moves a hand to palm one softly, marvelling at the feel of it, naked under her fingers. 

Feeling bolder watching Allie writhe under her touch, she moves to place an open mouthed kiss just above the nipple of her right breast. 

Allie's hands move to wrap themselves in Bea's hair, drawing her closer as Bea wraps her tongue around the erect peak and Allie lets out a deep shuddering moan in response. 

One hand continuing to move lazily over Allie's waist, Bea brings her other hand up to untangle Allie's hands from her hair, before bringing them up and pinning them firmly above their bodies. 

Allie's hips jerk upwards towards Bea's much too soft touch, and her mouth finally opens again in a plea. 

“Christ Bea, I'm sorry alright. You can do whatever you want to me later but stop fucking teasing and touch me before I scream.”

Bea smirks before dropping down to whisper in Allie's ear. “I knew I could get you to beg Novak, I just didn't think it would be so easy.”

“I don't fucking care,” Allie pants desperately. “I'll do whatever you want, anything, just as long as you hurry up and touch me.”

It's easier than she thought it was going to be, Bea thinks when her hand finally moves beneath her underwear to feel just how desperately Allie needs her. The other woman is incredibly responsive, and it takes her much less time than she thought to figure out how and where to touch her. 

She moves her fingers slowly at first, draws experimental little circles over Allie's clit, before applying more pressure and watching Allie's mouth fall open and gasp in response. 

She sweeps her fingers lower, slipping close to the edge of Allie's entrance when her hips move up, seeking deeper contact. 

“Tell me what you want,” Bea whispers in Allie's ear. 

“More,” comes the breathy reply. “I want more of you, I want you to fill me.”

Bea adds another finger slowly, moves her hand steadily back and forth, watching as Allie's cheeks flush even deeper before adding a third finger. 

“Oh god Bea,” she moans, much louder this time, and it's almost enough to make Bea drop her hands from where she's holding Allie's above her head still to clamp over her mouth, before she realises she doesn't fucking care if the whole prison hears their moans. 

“Just keep moving, just like that, just... faster,” Allie pants, her hips moving more erratically now, pushing down to meet Bea's fingers as they disappear inside her.

It's power like Bea's never known it before, to watch as Allie moves underneath her, more completely at her mercy than anyone has ever been. 

It only takes a couple of words in the end. Bea leans down and whispers into Allie's ear, while her nails press into Allie's wrists above. 

“You're mine, do you hear me. Mine. No one else's.”

Allie comes slowly and Bea watches in awe as the sensation washes over her body, her lean stomach rippling underneath the waves of pleasure. 

She moves to withdraw her fingers, but Allie frees her own hand to hold Bea's in place. 

“Not yet, just stay there a sec. I just want to feel you a bit longer,” she pants quietly.

“You sure you've never done that before?” Allie asks finally, not bothering to open her eyes and look at Bea. “Thank god for late bloomers then aye,” she says and Bea can hear rather than see the smirk in her words. 

“Fuck you,” Bea says again, finally removing her hand. 

“No, fuck me,” Allie says, rolling lazily on top of Bea. “Fuck me. Again and again and again.”  
-

Of course she's not wrong, Bea thinks wryly as they lay tangled together some lost amount of time later, the aftershocks of her latest orgasm still shaking their way through her body.

Allie had been like a dog with a fucking bone in every moment that had led to this, why would she stop short of having Bea moan her name loud enough for the whole fucking prison to hear. 

-

She wakes up much much later to the soft sound of Allie's voice calling her from the depths of her dreams. 

“Bea, come have a shower with me.”

She feels Allie try and pull away from her, but she only tightens her grip more firmly in response. 

“Hmm, not this morning,” Bea says voice rough with sleep. “Go back to sleep with me now and I'll make it worth your while when we wake up again.”

“You're on Smith, but it had better be fucking incredible. Better than shower sex,” Allie replies, sinking back into Bea's touch. 

“Maybe I'll finally let you finish what you tried to start in the shower.”

“Yeah, you should be so lucky,” Allie says finally, before sleep washes back over her. 

Yeah, Bea thinks to herself as she breathes in deeply, the smell of Allie washing over her senses. I should be so lucky indeed.

-


End file.
